Wednesday January 13, 2010

Good Morning!

Forgiveness, is there a more important word in our lexicon. To forgive is to pardon or release, isn't this what we do when we forgive someone? To pardon ones sins, ones mistakes. Not to forget, not to give a pass, but to acknowledge ones wrong doings, shortcomings, but still able to embrace them and then move on.

Forgiveness is a choice. A choice to be sustained and affirmed, or to move on and carry this burden with you. Not all are worthy of your forgiveness, but you grant it any way. You grant it not only to release the petitioner, but to also to release yourself. For to doom the wrong doer would also doom yourself. Or another way of stating the obvious, "So that is how I saves you by letting you save me". An odd turn of the written word, but it rings so true to all of us. Is it not a fact that when we forgive someone, we spontaneously forgive ourselves. Of course it is, we feel an immediate and lasting release and relief when we forgive someone. No matter how egregious the crime, without forgiveness we relinquish our power and been come the captive. Without forgiveness we are forever trapped in our pain and sorrow. We can't ever move on, move forward, to advance, we are frozen in time, in agony, in frustration at the inequity of life and in failing to understand the intricacies in a system we have created we doom ourselves to this insane cycle of forbearance instead of forgiveness and in so doing release ourselves from a self imposed hell.

All the spiritual traditions acknowledge the supremacy or the value of forgiveness, but many people still find it nearly impossible to do so. Just try it. Look honestly at one hurt you might have forgiven but just could not. Feel the anger, denial, guilt, shame or embarrassment. Imagine what it would be like to live without feeling this offense. Then embrace it with all your being, and just let it go. Wheeeeeeeeee!, Pretty powerful stuff. Other steps may be necessary for healing, but you get the picture. Confessing to your self and the aggrieved is a good start. making amends, acknowledging your contribution to the conflict, changing behavior, claiming or owning your feelings.

Forgiveness is a specific act, an attitude, an art and a way of life. Forgiveness then is a spiritual practice and a way of letting go of the past. of settling accounts, of doing good, and of moving forward into the future with hope. It is the first step on a path to a journey to wholeness, where guilt, anger, resentment no longer take center stage in your life. Forgiveness is not sympathy, generosity or acquiescence, it is the simple and pure declaration of equality where all pain may not be equal, but it is all pain none the less and it requires being acknowledged. It helps you see hurt for what it is, understand it, break it down, own it, then place it where it belongs. Since it can no longer hurt you, or enslave you, it can no longer cast its evil spell upon you. All connection is severed, broken forever, allowing you to move forward with your life, isn't this what it is all about.

Have a joyful day!

Robb